pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of sex education. we’ll do it properly.
public: applause
pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of snow plowing. we’ll do it properly.
public: confused applause
pornhub: chaotic good
what timeline is this
pornhub doing a better job than Trump/America
somewhere in all this bad pornhub is out here doing so much good
(via Justin Jorgensen) “In 2007 I worked with photographers Williams + Hirakawa to create a concept piece of me sleeping on a sheet cake. I though these cakes looked like pillows, and there’s the obvious play on ‘sweet dreams.’
I wondered if I could fall asleep on a cake and have sweet dreams. I didn’t. It was pretty gross really and wasn’t easy to wash off.
A few years later, outtakes from the shoot were sold to Getty Images as stock photos. I didn’t know this until 2011 when one of those photos made #13 on the wildly popular Buzzffed.com list of “60 Completely Unusable Stock Photos.”
Into 2014, the Getty Image photo continues to make the rounds on Facebook and Tumblr.”
i can’t believe i leveled up enough to unlock cake pillow guy’s backstory
I can’t believe the “sweet dreams” joke didn’t occur to me
have u ever met someone so terrible that it makes u a better person like u learn from mistakes that you haven’t even made purely from observing them, thank you for being so obnoxiously terrible, please don’t ever interact with me again
update: i’m no longer plagued by the presence of the person i wrote this about nine months ago, reblog this now and you too can banish your unloved ones within nine months
u kno when u go to bed in a tank top and u wake up with both titties out and that immediately puts u in a romantic ass mood like. too bad no one is here to appreciate these
my kinda boyfriend person took me to build a bear today for my birthday and he chose a sound to put in it and like he wouldn’t let me know what sound it was and he said I couldn’t listen until we got in the car so I was kinda worried bc I thought it was going to be super vulgar or sappy and gross or whatever but we leave build a bear and I press my bear’s hand and it just makes this super loud velociraptor sound.
update: the bear’s name is Jeff and he sleeps in my bed and last night I rolled on top of him and proceeded to get so freaked out by that god forsaken dinosaur noise that I rolled off the bed.
